For the record, I have not seen any other Ocean’s movie, nor do I plan to. I have no doubt in my mind that Ocean’s 8 is the franchise’s best film and if any pretentious dude bro who hates the “femme-washing” of it wants to argue with me, they can choke.
Ocean’s 8 was one of the most enjoyable films I’ve seen in theaters in a LONG TIME and I’ve already seen it twice. Akin to the familial stylings of say, a Miss Congeniality or even National Treasure (which, I fully believe there should be a National Treasure 3), Ocean’s 8 has that certain TNT rewatchability but even better because it’s all women (+ James Corden)! This movie draws you in immediately with Sandra Bullock’s cakey foundation and stringy hair she pulls off so well and knocks it out of the park with seven more fantastic women. This movie, as quoted by Bullock’s character, isn’t for you or for me; it’s for the “8-year-old girl dreaming of becoming a criminal. [This is] for her.”
- meh some spoilers -
I had huge high expectations for this movie, what with Rihanna and Mindy Kaling along with Anne Hathaway and Cate Blanchett in its lineup, how can one not? But there really was something tingling about seeing each of the major women be introduced in the movie. Sandra Bullock obviously is the mastermind, who as sister to Danny Ocean in the Ocean’s series, is a convicted felon. Her partner-in-crime (and girlfriend honestly, ‘cuz we all know they’re fucking) is the one and only Cate Blanchett. Cate Blanchett, with her platinum blunt bob and extremely stylish suits and that silk bomber jacket oh my god, definitely had me feeling some feels for her in this film. Together, they recruit Helena Bonham Carter, with her random and impressive Irish accent, who plays a fashion designer, to plant a necklace on the “ample bosom” of Anne Hathaway’s character. This Cartier necklace is meant to be worth over $150 million! They further recruit the help of comical jeweler Mindy Kaling, the hell-of-a-hacker Rihanna (as Nine Ball), the street thief Awkwafina, and good ol’ suburban mom Tammy (Sarah Paulson). The women concoct a beautiful plan to steal the necklace and it unravels in truly AMAZING ways.
If you’ve ever taken a screenwriting class, they’ll often tell you that the setting is like another character. And this is especially true here, because why? The heist takes place at the most glamorous and most exclusive night of fashion, the Met Gala hosted by Anna Wintour of Vogue. First of all, what a way to throwback to Anne Hathaway’s The Devil Wear Prada am I right? Part of what I loved so much about this movie was that we really got to see these stunning women pull of such a stunt against such a beautiful backdrop. Everything was just so. damn. SNEAKY! The number of celebrity cameos was also fun to look out for, it was like playing Where’s Waldo. And of course the heist comes to completion with each of the women descending the staircase in their stunning gowns, which, can we PLEASE talk about Rihanna and how fucking STUNNING she is! She literally could’ve done nothing in this film and my eye still would’ve gone straight to her. She killed it.
Alas, you thought it was over, right? Wrong, because what this film manages to do perfectly well is pacing. It captures three full acts of story (the plan, the execution, the aftermath). And it is in this aftermath that you’re like, oh no, they’re gonna get caught and they’re all gonna get thrown in jail. If they get thrown in jail, what’s that gonna say about female criminals and their ability to pull off such a heist (as compared to the men of the Ocean’s series, which I still haven’t watched). But of course, they prevailed in the most scrumptious way ever and I absolutely loved every fucking second of this movie.
And if you leave the theater wanting to fucking rob a museum like I did, I am here to say, I am your gal. I’m really good at Photoshopping shit, collage-ing upscale Snapchat/IG stories, and can pick out a ripe watermelon a mile away.